Friday, November 20, 2009

When Sally Met Forty

Harry Burns: There are two kinds of women: high maintenance and low maintenance.
Sally Albright: Which one am I?
Harry Burns: You're the worst kind; you're high maintenance but you think you're low maintenance.
Sally Albright: I don't see that.

Andy drives a 2005 Saab 93. He picked it up, brand-spanking-new, the day Gremlin was born. After Gremlin was born (we'll talk later). It's already got over 100,000 miles on it thanks to his 110-mile-a-day commute. It's never been in an accident but it's had the windshield replaced, the little Saab medallions on the hood and trunk have lost their paint, we need to get yet another set of tires, and it seems to go through headlights at at unusually high rate. Now, it's got some issue with the front struts, which is going to be pricey. It still looks pretty good and it drives like the wind.

The thing is? In these past (14) few months, somewhere between turning 40 and now? Much like the Saab, I've become high maintenance. I was taking an assessment the other day;
  • I still need to lose those last (20) 10 pounds.
  • I was trying to decide whether I was in more dire need of a hair cut or color. The answer was both.
  • My eyebrows were about to connect with my eyelashes.
  • Doing my makeup used to entail a little eyeliner and mascara. It now involves both concealer as well as foundation before we even get to the actual "make up" portion.
  • I won't delve too deep into specifics but lets just say there's tweezing and plucking over which I must keep strict vigilance.
  • Shorts Capri season is over so leg-shaving is definitely taking a back seat. Sexxay.
  • My nails are snapping off at an alarming rate due to my obsessive compulsive hand washing.
From my heels to my hair, I can't think of an area of my body that doesn't require some kind of ongoing upkeep. I watch my husband get ready in the morning. Shower, shave, dress, leave.

Is it time to trade in for a newer model? Nah. Do I still clean up pretty well? Sure. But damn. All this maintenance is time-consuming and costly. Just like driving the Saab.

How are you holding up?


13 comments:

rachel... said...

I'm holding up about as well as you. Except I'm only 34. Yikes.

Life As I Know It said...

yes, the maintenance and upkeep gets more extensive as the years go by, huh?
I'm starting to need reading glasses. The eye doctor told me I'm 2 years ahead of the game since that usually doesn't happen until 40. Yay me.

Marie said...

I'm with you... Only,I've still got a way to 40. I didn't used to care, but recently I've started caring & I'm seeing myself through different eyes, man what the years have done to me!!!

sitting on the mood swing at the playground said...

Issues, I have issues...

Let's see I think it's time for reading glasses, which I've earned.

I've earned the gray hairs, which I don't want.

I need to exercise more, which I'm not really in the mood to do.

I don't fit into all of my clothes, which is annoying--but understandable...see above.

On second thought I think I'll skip the reading glasses...I might notice more things I don't want to see.

merlotmom said...

I totally get you, babe. And the extra layers of moisturizer needed on my face...the fact that I can no longer use powder concealer under my eyes because it SITS in my wrinkles...the muffin top that hangs over my pant waist like froth over a cappucino...need I go on?? I think NOT.

But you do look great, my dear. Even for a middle aged woman (spoken from a woman older than you so it's okay I say that...)

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

It has alway seemed so unfair the way men are out the door in 5 minutes.

Just wait until you're 45--then the fun really begins.

{sue} said...

Is this really about me? Is it an intervention? GOD knows I need one.

Andy needs to sell the Saab so you can afford to be in your 40s. It's damn expensive.

(And promise you will tell the story about how YOU just had a baby, and he went out and got a new car?? I'm dying to read that one.)

{sue} said...

Totally depressed now, Jenn! Gah!

tracey.becker1@gmail.com said...

Hey, my husband works nights and it is COLD out, so my legs are furry from Monday - Thursday. On Friday morning, I shave like a madwoman, JUST IN CASE.

Fragrant Liar said...

Personal upkeep? I'm exhausted just thinking about it. I went so far as to recently get a bladder sling. Yes, you gotta keep up the inside too.

Next? Fractional Laser treatments. I'm tired of the makeup...

anymommy said...

My maintenance records would void my warranty.

The Lady's Lounge said...

Let's see...

2 inches of gray roots that I keep pretending nobody can see if I set my hair like "this".


A closet full of shoes that I would have been embarrassed to wear in the 90's, nevermind 2009!

toenails half polished... not so cute anymore

and
A bikini wax so overdue that I'm grateful that my boyfriend has the flu and a 4 billion degree fever because it will buy me some time.

Yep... I'm 39

http://www.theladyslounge.com

Kate Coveny Hood said...

I hate this about getting older. I used to take pride in how low maintenance I was. Now I have "product" exploding out of my cabinets.

 

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