Monday, August 11, 2008

Because I'm the Mommy (and the new classics)

- Apologize to your brother.
- C'mon, I'll take you back to your bed.
- Did you do poops?
- Did you flush?
- Did you look under the couch?
- Did you wash your hands?
- Dinner!
- Do you have to go poops?
- Doggies bite, not boys. Are you a doggie?
- Don't touch that. It has germs on it.
- Drink your milk.
- Eat that in the kitchen.
- Fine, we just won't go to ________.
- Get down from there!
- Get. back. in. bed.
- God puts the baby in mommy's belly.
- I am not the maid.
- I love you up to the sky
- If we have good behavior, we can talk about a prize.
- If you do that one more time...
- Inside voice! (better when you scream it!)
- It's chicken. You love chicken.
- It's not morning yet.
- No, it's too early for a Popsicle.
- No, not today.
- No, time out is not over yet.
- No. You can't wear that to school.
- Please put that in the trash.
- Put the cushions back on the couch.
- Seatbelts on.
- Stay where you can see me. What if a stranger took you?
- Stop doing that to the cat.
- Stop doing that to the dog.
- This is not a restaurant.
- Three more bites and then you can be done.
- Time to get in the tub.
- Time to get out of the tub.
- Try and do peeps before we go.
- Turn the TV down.
- We'll see.
- We're going to get ants.
- What did I just say?
- Where are your shoes?
- Where did you leave it?
- Why would you think it was okay to do that?
- Your shirt is inside out.
- You're old enough to dress yourself.
- Yes.

What are your classics?


Jennifer H said...

Have your kids figured out yet that "We'll see" means no?

You've covered most of the good ones, I think, but...

Did you wash your hands? With soap?
Don't even look at each other.

No wonder we're exhausted.

merlotmom said...

-Flush the toilet (did you say that one?)
-Laundry goes in the hamper
-No, I won't wipe your tushie for you
-No, we're not buying Pokemon cards today
-How did I get here?

Jenn @ Juggling Life said...

You call it spying; we call it parenting.

Sunshine said...

Which one of you peed on the toilet seat?

Don't put that pillow over your brother's face!!

Denise said...

peeps and poops? Aw, that's cuteness!

Stella said...

Lately it's been

Stop licking the wall

Stop licking the window

Stop licking the door

Found you through AllMediocre!!

Trenches of Mommyhood said...

OMG, you are ME! I say all those! Another classic here in the Trenches-- when the boyz ask where something is, our response is always, "It's wherever you left it."

jeanette said...

My oft used comments are:

"I saw it there today, go and look again..."

"What part of 'no' don't you understand?!"

"You had a 'boy look'" - (For those of you with daughters, this is a cursary 'look when you're not really having a look', for a lost item) beloved of non-observant husbands and sons everywhere)

Cheri @ Blog This Mom! said...

I'll give you $1 if you _____.

Danni said...

So says your sister with five kids, "Whatever your name is, you know that I meant you!"

Teril said...

*"Hey I saw that and yes I do have eyes in the back of my head"
* I know what your doing, I was kid once remember"
*Get off your sister!
*Don't touch the baby's face
*Hands out of your mouth
*You didn't use soap! Let me smell your hands
*No you can't go over there
*Outta the fridge
*Those are the yummy vitamins

Kalynne Pudner said...

Your kids must be younger than mine. Here are this week's top three:

"Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, please keep me from acts of filicide today."

"You may pay for the gas, but the title belongs to me."

"Where the hell did I leave my Prozac?"

Limbic Resonance said...

Overheard when my sister's kids were in the tub the other day:
"get your finger out of your brother's butt."

Sue @ My Party of 6 said...

Whoa! For a minute, I thought you were posting about my house! Especially the thing about chicken. EVERYTHING is chicken here. It just comes in different colors.

Ashlie- MommyCosm said...

WOW, you just wrote the script for my day yesterday. My daughter is 6 and son is 3.

I would have to add:
"For the love.of.GOD, why do you two always fight when I'm trying to answer the phone?!"

Ramblin' Red said...

My all-time favorite:

"At least ACT like you love each other!"

Found you at Allmediocre


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