The Rhetorical Husband

1. Do we have milk?
(Hmm. If I had bought milk, where would I put it?)

2. Is this today's paper?
(Let's look at the top. Just below the words, The Boston Globe, what's right there?)

3. Do you know where I took off my watch?
(...?)

4. Do you want me to give Gremlin his bath?
(No! Please. Let me.)

5. Do you know if it's supposed to rain today?
(Well, my trick knee is throbbing...)

6. Do you know where the boys' shoes are?
(See #3)

7. Picks up phone and reads caller ID aloud: 866-222-1000?
(I'm gonna go with "telemarketer"...)

8. Should I have the boys wear their raincoats?
(Is it raining?)

9. Are you watching this?
(Uh-huh...)

10. Are you awake?


What questions do you answer (or ignore)?

Any Excuse to Celebrate

Do you know what today is??

Now do you know what today is??

Maybe we should start with lurking: In Internet culture, a lurker is a person who reads discussions on a message board, newsgroup, chatroom, file sharing or other interactive system, but rarely if ever posts or participates. God love The Wikipedia.

So in the true spirit of the "holiday," I'm going to tell you something about me and I invite you to delurk and tell me something about you.

My first "boyfriend" was named Kevin. He lived two doors down from me. I was about 10 years old and he was 11. He brought me lilacs that he cut from another neighbor's lilac bush. He also allowed me to ride his Huffy "Phantom 56" bike when no other girl was allowed to ride it.

Fast forward two summers. Kevin was also the first boy I ever kissed. He was 13/almost 14 and I was 12/almost 13. We were playing Truth or Dare and I chose dare. Suddenly, we're kissing. He smelled like Chaps cologne and tasted like Velamints. I knew right there and then that I liked kissing.

Do you remember your first boyfriend? Who was it?

Do you remember your first kiss? How was it?

Oh, The Heart-Stopping Goodness

Artichoke~Cheese Dip

~ 1 small jar artichoke hearts
~ 1 16 oz container sour cream (I use light)
~ 2 cups shredded cheddar
~ 1 brick cream cheese
~ 1/2 cup shredded parmesan
~ freshly ground pepper to taste
~ 1 medium to large loaf round bread, any type (I prefer sour dough)
~ 1 loaf French bread


~warm refrigerated cream cheese in microwave for one minute, in medium mixing bowl
~finely chop artichoke hearts and add to softened cream cheese
~add all other ingredients and mix well with mixer (explain when son asks what mixer is)
~pour into hollowed out bread bowl and replace "cover"
~wrap bowl in aluminum foil and place on cookie sheet
~cook in preheated 375 degree oven for 1 hour

~serve with cubed french bread and this

For Nancy, who asked for the recipe. I could eat this stuff for dinner.

Trying to Reason with the Hurricane Season

Full Jimmy Buffet download to follow but for now, Kristen, this one's for you:

Send more business cards. Everywhere I wear these, I always get complimented and questioned.

Hotties Through the Years: Volume I

For your Monday viewing pleasure, we offer a full array of eye candy.








Naughty Candy













Preppy, pretty candy

















Cold Dead Hands Candy








Clever, witty candy























Candy with integrity




















Brokeback candy






We will be serving up plenty more candy once Blogger and I are back on speaking terms.

So what're some of your favorite candies from Hollywood's Golden Age?

Vacation Moments

HRH: His Royal Halibut...we couldn't keep him out of the water. RC in his Hawaiian Elmo "bagging suit"

My mom and I went out one night and Andy got the boys out of bed to catch a rainbow. I hope you can see it.I can't recommend the Pirate Adventure highly enough for ages 3 to about 7 or 8. Arrr.
Yes, I was wearing a blue golf shirt and khaki shorts also. No, we didn't do this every day. They boys and Andy were a coincidence, then I saw it and decided to geek out and join in. Andy called us the Griswolds.

Bless him, Andy got up every morning around 6:30 with the boys to go fishing. By Wednesday, they had yet to catch anything. He thinks it had less to do with his skills as a fisherman and more to do with the large number of rocks being thrown into the water beside the fishing lines.

At this point, it was time to find a boat. Let me give a shout out to another local, Cap't Danny and Clamneck Charters, who have a very kid-centric 1 1/2 hour catch-and-release fishing trip staying inside Lewis Bay. Each kid must have caught at least a school of porgies.We had a fantatic deck off our bedroom where we were able to set up a telescope and show the boys the moon close up.

I don't think they made it to bed at the correct time the entire week. Vacations are about saying 'yes' more than you normally can.

Maybe they'll be astronauts or astronomers.

Or maybe they'll just remember another family vacation on the Cape.

Won Word Meme

Last week, I joined AllMediocre in the interest of getting a little more traffic to my site (cause I need validation like that) and I'm always interested in reading blogs that might have something in common with mine. Since then, I've been having a good time linking around (cause I'm a bit of a blog slut like that) and reading new friends.

Tonight, I linked onto A Mom Two Boys (cause it sounds familiar) and was on post number 5 or 6 before I realized that it was Meghan who had actually founded All Mediocre (cause I'm sharp like that).

Meghan was tagged with a meme in which you have to answer each question with only one word. Her answers were cute and funny but what made them unusual was that she included a second set of answers expanding on her original single-word answer. I'm stealing both the meme and the extended mix version (cause I like to pay homage like that). I'm also adding A Mom Two Boys to my feeds (cause I like her style).

1. Where is your cell phone? Bag

2. Your significant other? Andy

3. Your hair? Curly

4. Your mother? Me

5. Your father? Dead

6. Your favorite thing? Sleep

7. Your dream last night? ??

8 Your favorite drink? Wine

9. Your dream/goal? Retirement

10. The room you’re in? Kitchen

11. Your hobby? Yoga

12. Your fear? Trouble

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Designing

14. What you’re not? Confident

15. Muffins? Eh

16. One of your wish list items? Bath

17. Where you grew up? Bostonish

18. The last thing you did? TV

19. What are you wearing? Shorts

20. Favorite Gadget? Cell

21. Your pets? Superfluous

22. Your computer? New!!

23. Your mood? Eh

24. Missing someone? Yeah

25. Your car? Hazmat

26. Something you’re not wearing? Shoes

27. Favorite store? Target

28. Like someone? Huz

29. Your favorite color? Green

30. When was the last time you laughed? 4:00-ish

31. Last time you cried? Years

Now the DJ-AM Extended Club Mix:

1. Where is your cell phone? In my purse. Mostly dead. I have to remember to charge it when I'm home because the majority of my car trips are too short to get a good charge.

2. Your significant other? Andy. Just called me into the living room to watch Princess Leah in chains

3. Your hair? Curly. I got it cut over a week ago but still haven't bothered to style it because it's been too humid. And humid + curly = frizz.

4. Your mother? Me. I know what I'm going to be 22 years from now. Always have.

5. Your father? Dead. I let that sleeping dog lie.

6. Your favorite thing? Sleep. Sad, but at this juncture, probably true.

7. Your dream last night? I dreamed a 3-year-old kept getting out of his bed and coming into mine. Oh...wait...

8 Your favorite drink? Wine or maybe Tea. No. Wine.

9. Your dream/goal? Retirement. Summer on the Cape. Winter in Naples, Fl. Freelancing if we want to. And as long as it doesn't interfere with travel or golf.

10. The room you’re in? Kitchen. Because I need to be sitting at a table or desk to type well.

11. Your hobby? Yoga. It goes with that whole mind/body/spirit thing I'm working on.

12. Your fear? Trouble. AKA something bad happening to my family.

13. Where do you want to be in 6 years? Designing. The plan is that after the boys are in school full time, I go back to Boston Architectural College to study interior design. It's good to be nearly 40 and finally figure out what you want to be when you grow up.

14. What you’re not? Confident. I'll let that one stand alone for now as well

15. Muffins? Eh. Brownies on the other hand...

16. One of your wish list items? Bath. As in Master. Whenever we talk about a new house, that is an absolute. The definition of true luxury.

17. Where you grew up? Bostonish. Basically, I've lived in two towns my whole life.

18. The last thing you did? TV. I love almost anything on HGTV. Tonight it was Curb Appeal and Hidden Potential. I can't be bothered to link them.

19. What are you wearing? Shorts. It's 9:46 and still 80 degrees outside. The kitchen temp is 74.7 in case you were interested.

20. Favorite Gadget? Cell phone. I don't know anyone's phone number, I just know their speed dial. I also keep my appointments in there, and take lots of pictures.

21. Your pets? Superfluous. Not true but I needed just one word. They were my practice babies. While we're on vacation, we're making my sister stay at my mother's house so Maddie doesn't need to go to a kennel because at 8 years old, my dog has never spent a single night by herself. I don't think she knows she's a dog and not a person.

22. Your computer? New!! The funny thing is I needed a laptop so I could blog anywhere yet somehow I always end up in the kitchen.

23. Your mood? Eh. I'm in kind of a weird place right now. The boys are kicking my ass and I'm having trouble getting back in the zone.

24. Missing someone? Yeah. My best friend, Chris. It's a long story.

25. Your car? Hazmat. Not only is it my car but it's the family car, too. Just today, I proposed we hang onto it for a boat hauler/winter vehicle for Andy because the trade in will be junk anyway. This will leave me free to get something that still works for the kids and us but has a little more style/better fuel economy. I'm thinking possibly a CR-V.

26. Something you’re not wearing? Shoes. Now it's 79.7 degrees outside

27. Favorite store? Target. Where else can you go to buy a printer ink cartridge, personal lubricant, and five pounds of almonds? Exactly.

28. Like someone? Huz. Andy and I have these 'dates' where we sit in the kitchen, drink wine, and talk. It's sort of nice after 8 years of marriage to still have something to say to one another.

29. Your favorite color? Green (like my cooking)

30. When was the last time you laughed? Earlier. When I came downstairs and found a naked RC coming in the back door stating "I just peed on the deck."

31. Last time you cried? Years. My mom calls us 'the frozen chosen.' Just keep pushing those emotions down, pushing them down.

And hey, look! I'm breaking with tradition and tagging JCK at Motherscribe (cause she's going to Blogher and I'm soooo envious) and Fran at Merlot Mom (cause she is too, dammit!).

Redefining Funny

This email was sent to me by my friend, Nancy. It's basically spam so I'm not able to confirm its contents or origin. It still cracked me up and so I wanted to share. Enjoy!


The Washington Post has published the winning submissions to its yearly contest, in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for common words. And the winners are:

1. Coffee, n. The person upon whom one coughs.

2. Flabbergasted, adj. Appalled by discovering how much weight one has gained.

3. Abdicate, v. To give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.

4. Esplanade, v. To attempt an explanation while drunk.

5. Willy-nilly, adj. Impotent.

6. Negligent, adj. Absentmindedly answering the door when wearing only a nightgown.

7. Lymph, v. To walk with a lisp.

8. Gargoyle, n. Olive-flavored mouthwash.

9. Flatulence, n. Emergency vehicle that picks up someone who has been run over by a steamroller.

10. Balderdash, n. A rapidly receding hairline.

11. Testicle, n. A humorous question on an exam.

12. Rectitude, n. The formal, dignified bearing adopted by proctologists.

13. Pokemon, n. A Rastafarian proctologist.

14. Oyster, n. A person who sprinkles his conversation with yiddishisms.

15. Frisbeetarianism, n. The belief that, after death, the soul flies up onto the roof and gets stuck there.

16. Circumvent, n . An opening in the front of boxer shorts worn by Jewish men.


I'm torn between # 7 and 13 as my favorite. What's yours?

Car Talk

Click and Clack have nothing on HRH.

Scene: As we're leaving Starbucks' parking lot.

HRH: Mommy, I think I see a car that looks like Lila's daddy's.

MM: Oh? Which one?

HRH: Right there, next to the black one.

MM: Close they're both silver but that car is called a Pontiac. Lila's daddy's car is called a-

HRH: Beef Wellington?

MM: ?????

Dirty Little Secrets, Dirty Little Lies

My long-lost, fraternal twin, Denise over at Real. Life. Ramblings. tagged me to provide my list of 10 Guilty Pleasures. Coincidentally, a while back, KC at Where's My Cape was supposed to have written about five songs she's embarrassed to admit she liked. As it turns out, for all the bad songs she likes, she's not a even a little embarrassed. KC was on my mind when I was thinking about pleasures, which are guilty and which are just embarrassing. Mine reflect a little of each.

1. Starbucks 2% Venti Iced Tazo Chai Latte, with eight pumps.
This is a guilty pleasure on two fronts, the first being the CALORIES (oh, Lordy, I wish I hadn't linked there just now), which equate to a small meal, and the second being cost. We're talking around $4.35 each. Not to mention I've usually got at least one kid in the car with me, so there's an extra $1.50 each for a Vanilla Milk.

2. When I outlast Andy emptying the trash.
Andy has garbage detail. I handle almost all other internal cleaning, bed making, etc. Usually, Andy will take a look-see in the morning before work and take it out if the bag is almost full. Some days, he forgets. On these occasions (for the most part), I can fit a day's worth of garbage into the remaining 1/2 inch of available space. This is truly a guilty pleasure because I do feel bad about doing it but I also find satisfaction in waiting him out.

3. I can't believe I'm writing this for the world to see but...Romance Novels.
The really cheesy Harlequin Romance variety that you can buy at Stop and Shop. I like to say that it's because my mind is so busy elsewhere that I need to read something besides magazines but not something I have to work at. Yeah, that's the ticket.

4. 70s Music
This is where KC's list comes into play. I too have no shame. I realized this driving around 80 mph with all the windows open listening to...my John Denver CD and screaming along with the lyrics.

5. Pedicures
I'd say on average I've gotten a pedi every 3-4 weeks for the past 12 years. A few years back, I brought my then 10-year-old niece for her first pedi. An older woman at the shop commented on it and I told her it was indoctrination. I went on to say out loud that my own husband doesn't find it in the least odd that I don't cut my own toenails.

6. US Weekly/People Magazine
You know what they say; the first one's free. I used to travel a lot for work and buy them at the airport. Then I bought them when I was in the long checkout lines at Stop and Shop. I have no more excuses. I read them. I've never seen an episode of The Hills/Gossip Girl/The Kardashians (sp?) but I know about their stars from reading these rags.

7. Mommy Popsicles
I live on a cul-de-sac with ten houses and a seven kids ages five and under. As a result from the time the snow melts in the spring until it starts again in the late fall, we're outside playing. The reality is that it's also somewhat wearing to police a group of pre-schoolers intent on rolling the Cozy Coupe down a steep driveway, running through the non-child-bearing neighbors' gardens, drawing on our cars with chalk, etc. (I know; boo-hoo. I don't feel sorry for me either). So some afternoons, my fellow SAHM and I will break out the Corona Lites. Suddenly, it's 6:20, Andy's pulling up in front of the house, and the closest I've come to dinner is slicing a lime.

8. NPR - National Public Radio
I love it. I've been listening for years. My absolute favorites are Talk of the Nation/Science Friday and Wait, Wait, Don't Tell Me. When RC recently gave up napping and I began the Snooze Cruise, I confessed to my friend that I was very excited to be spending time with my brainy, liberal lover again.

9. Weddings
I don't know if this qualifies as a guilty pleasure or just odd. I always give a nice gift and am very social. I like dancing a. lot. Particularly if I've had a cocktail or five two. And during these dance marathons, should a song like say, I Will Survive (no hyperlink necessary here) comes on, I'm acting it out in full histrionic gyration. And I'm probably taking you with me.

10. Blogging
Shocking, given my "phone-it-in" status of late but this is definitely a pleasure for me. The guilt comes into play when I neglect the little things in life (children, food, housework) in favor of reading and writing the minutia of everyday life.

You Know You Want Some

Louisa’s* Sangria Recipe

7 Liters** of red wine (nothing too fancy)
1 L- apple brandy
1 L- orange juice (best with pulp)
0.5 L- lemon juice (concentrate is fine)
1 L- apple juice
3 lbs. of oranges (optional: 1 lb. Lemons)
3 cups of sugar

11 liters total volume + fruit = need about a 15 liter container

Dissolve sugar in 2 cups of very hot water
Chop fruit and squeeze out juice
Add parts to Sangria

Chill overnight

~~~~~~~
* Louisa is my neighbor. She makes the best Sangria I've ever tasted.
** 1 Liter = 0.264 gallons. This recipe makes approximately 3 (2.904) gallons of Sangria.

*** Now updated to include picture of finished product!

Yes, it's in a bucket. I don't have a five gallon punch bowl - do you? Can I borrow it?

Yes, I bought the bucket new and scrubbed it before using it.

Yes, it takes up practically all of my fridge.

Yes, I taste-tested it - and it. is. yummy.

The Gift that Keeps on Giving

My friend JCK over at Motherscribe (check out her sassy new look) has tagged me for the six word memoir meme.

Though JCK describes it not, Holly at June Cleaver Nirvana, JCK's tagger, describes the task thusly: Sum up my life in six words. No more, no less. The loophole is you can write as many of these six word sentences as you want.

Brown Eyed Girl; Bleary Eyed Mom

No Freudian Slip Here; I Fall

One Size Does Not Fit All

Counting My Blessings, Every Single Day

Some Nice Girls Do Finish First

Don't Put That In Your Mouth

Young Women Want What I Have

Don't Call It Paranoia; It's Intuition

One Brain Cell at a Time

May I See the Dessert Menu?

Do Not Try This at Home

Survived my 20s to be Happy.

Keep Me Sane; Make Me Crazy

Warning: this exercise can be addictive. You think in six word sentences. (See what I did just there?)

I'm tagging Jennifer at Thursday Drive because I can't wait to see her words everyday.

My buddy, Denise at real. life. ramblings. because I heard Hey There Delilah on the radio and thought of her (cause I first heard it on her site).

And Phoenix because we tag each other.

Movie Meme

This meme has been floating around the blogisphere for a little while. I took up the gauntlet thrown down by Jenn over at Juggling Life. I don't know if she coined this particular phrasing but the use of the word behold makes me smile.

Behold, the rules:
- Pick fifteen of your favorite movies.
- Go to IMDB and find a quote from each movie.
- Post them on your blog for everyone to guess.
- Fill in the film title once it's guessed.

This part is for the reader
- No Googling or using IMDB search functions.
- Leave your answer(s) in the comments.

And away, we go:


Movie 1:
- Will you have me, lady?
- No, my lord, unless I might have another for working days. Your grace is too costly to wear everyday. But I beseech your Grace to pardon me; for I was born to speak all mirth and no matter.
- Your silence most offends me, and to be merry best becomes you; for, out of question, you were born in a merry hour.
- No, sure, my lord, my mother cried; but then there was a star danced, and under that was I born...
Much Ado About Nothing (Andy and Manic Little Sister)

Movie 2:
- How long was it we had, honey?
- I didn't count the days.
- Well, I did. Every one of 'em. Mostly I remember the last one. The wild finish. A guy standing on a station platform in the rain with a comical look in his face because his insides have been kicked out.
Casablanca (Karen at The More, the Messier)

Movie 3:
- Y'know, this was supposed to be my weekend off, but noooo. You got me out here draggin' your heavy ass through the burnin' desert with your dreadlocks stickin' out the back of my parachute. You gotta come down here with an attitude, actin' all big and bad... and what the hell is that smell? I could've been at a barbecue! But I ain't mad.
Independence Day (Andy, Manic Little Sister, and Denise at real. life. ramblings.)

Movie 4:
- That's it? Some faceless guy rips off all your clothes, and THAT'S the sex fantasy you've been having since you were twelve?
- Well sometimes I vary it a little.
- Which part?
- What I'm wearing.
When Harry Met Sally (Jen at Monkey Planet)

Movie 5:
- It's out of control, and it's coming your way. You got about fifteen minutes. Now, they wanna try somethin'. They wanna blow those water tanks two floors above you. They think it might kill the fire.
- How're they gonna get the explosives up here?
- Oh, they'll find some dumb son of a bitch to bring it up.
The Towering Inferno (yeah, ~Denise! from real. life. ramblings. got the last one! Well played!)


Movie 6:
- What do you know of my heart? What do you know of anything but your own suffering. For weeks, Marianne, I've had this pressing on me without being at liberty to speak of it to a single creature. It was forced on me by the very person whose prior claims ruined all my hope. I have endured her exultations again and again whilst knowing myself to be divided from Edward forever. Believe me, Marianne, had I not been bound to silence I could have provided proof enough of a broken heart, even for you.
Sense and Sensibility (Jen at Monkey Planet)

Movie 7:
- You'd better tell the Captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.
- A hospital? What is it?
- It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.
Airplane (Jenn at Juggling Life)

Movie 8:
- What are you talking about? How'd you figure that?
- I can add.
- Jack, they've got half the Ph.D.'s on the planet working on it.
- Houston says we're right on the money.
- And what if they had made a mistake, all right? And there was no way to reverse it, you think they would tell us? There's no reason for them to tell us!
- What do you mean they're not going to tell us? That's bullshit!
- All right, there's a thousand things that have to happen in order. We are on number eight. You're talking about number six hundred and ninety-two.
Apollo 13 (Jenn at Juggling Life)

Movie 9:
- Hold your ground, hold your ground! Sons of Gondor, of Rohan, my brothers! I see in your eyes the same fear that would take the heart of me. A day may come when the courage of men fails, when we forsake our friends and break all bonds of fellowship, but it is not this day. An hour of woes and shattered shields, when the age of men comes crashing down! But it is not this day! This day we fight! By all that you hold dear on this good Earth, I bid you stand, Men of the West!
Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King (Auntie Jen - good second effort. Honorable Mention to JCK, our Motherscribe who identified her boyfriend, The Viggo)

Movie 10:
- Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father prepare to die.
The Princess Bride (Jenn at Juggling Life)

Movie 11:
- Meanwhile, I struggled for exactly the right BB gun hint. It had to be firm, but subtle.
- Flick says he saw some grizzly bears near Pulaski's candy store!
- They looked at me as if I had lobsters crawling out of my ears.
A Christmas Story (Jenn at Juggling Life)

Movie 12:
- Fellows, let's be reasonable, huh? This is not the time or the place to perform some kind of a half-assed autopsy on a fish... And I'm not going to stand here and see that thing cut open and see that little Kintner boy spill out all over the dock.
Jaws (Jenn at Juggling Life)

Movie 13:
- You're a thief and a liar.
- I only lied about being a thief, I don't do that anymore.
- Steal?
- Lie.
- I'm with someone who doesn't have to make that kind of distinction.
Ocean's 11 (Kristi)

Movie 14:
- We have pictures of you so-called mooners. And just because the pictures aren't of your faces doesn't mean we can't identify you. At this very moment those pictures are on their way to Washington where the FBI has experts in this type of identification. If you turn yourselves in now, you may escape a Federal charge.
Grease (Manic Little Sister)

Movie 15:
- There I was, standing there in the church, and for the first time in my whole life I realised I totally and utterly loved one person. And it wasn't the person next to me in the veil. It's the person standing opposite me now... in the rain.
- Is it still raining? I hadn't noticed.
Four Weddings and a Funeral (Jen at Monkey Planet)

Like Jenn, I won't tag anyone but consider playing. The research alone is so much fun you'll want to go re-watch all your movies.


Only two more to go! Andy guessed them but didn't post a comment so they're still fair game. And my little sister was wrong and boy is she going to be pissed.

A Love Story in Four Pictures

From an email sent by my mother. I wish I could give credit where credit is due.

Love the wife-beater.

iPod Meme

Phoenix over at Phoenix Says Stuff did this meme way back on January 13th and I thought it was so cool that I finally remembered a month and a half later to post my own. BTW, P? As a personal favor, could you please post your labels so I don't need to just keep hitting "older post" to find this thing?

Phoenix also reported on the style of her style iPod so I figured I should as well. It's a Mini and it's green, which is my favorite color, and Andy bought it for me when I was trying running 2 1/2 years ago. I think I ran with it twice. I hate running. I like yoga.

This is the iPod Meme. In the interest of full disclsure, I should mention that my much more technically savvy brother loaded my iPod for me (from my own collection of course) with a heavy Jimmy Buffett influence. Given the law of averages, JB was bound to show up quite a bit.

Anyway, the rules are simple: Hit shuffle on your iPod then answer each question by hitting next.

Q: What does next year have in store for you.
A: Halleluja, I Love Her So by Ray Charles

Q: What does your love life look like next year?

A: A Love Song from a Different Point of View (more commonly referred to as Why Don't We Get Drunk and Screw) by Jimmy Buffett (I DID NOT cheat!)

Q: What do you say when life gets hard?

A: Burn that Bridge by Jimmy Buffett

Q: Song that reminds you of good times?

A: Boogie on Reggae Woman by Stevie Wonder

Q: What do you think when you get up in the morning?

A: Lonesome Day by Bruce Springsteen

Q: What song will you dance to at your wedding?

A: Aint No Sunshine by Eva Cassidy (Actually, we danced to You Belong to Me by Patsy Cline)

Q: Song that reminds you of your first kiss?

A: Natives are Restless by Jimmy Buffett

Q: Your favorite saying?

A: Milk and Honey Days by Tim Gearan

Q: Favorite place?

A: Last Mango in Paris by Jimmy Buffett

Q: Most Missed Memory?

A: Chewin' Gum by Ella Fitzgerald

Q: What song describes your best friend?

A: I Wish by Stevie Wonder

Q: What song describes your ex?

A: It's All Understood by Jack Johnson

Q: Where would you go on a first date?

A: I'll be Home for Christmas by Jimmy Buffett

Q: Drug of choice?

A: It's Still Rock and Roll to Me by Billy Joel

Q: What song describes yourself?

A: Taxman by The Beatles

Q: What is the thing you like doing most?

A: Here We Go Again by Ray Charles

Q: The song that best describes the president?

A: Rock and Roll Music by The Beatles (If I were going to cheat, it would have been here)

Q: Where will you be in 10 years?

A: Cry by Ray Charles (that's not good)

Q: Your love life right now?

A: Paper Tiger by Beck

Q: What is your state of mind like at the moment?

A: Frozen Man by James Taylor

Q: How will you die?

A: The News by Jack Johnson

Inside the Over-Reactor's Studio

Guys, this was so fun. Thanks for coming through for me. And the Oscar goes to...

Phoenix wanted to know...

1. Favorite Book of all time?
Such a hard question. Recently? I've read all the Harry Potters with varying degrees of enjoyment but most enjoy sharing the thoughts, and ideas, and messages with my nieces. I liked DaVinci Code by liked Angels and Demons much better. I was thinking about all the Judy Blumes that I read as an adolescent and how really, really great they were.

Then I came up with Brave New World by Aldous Huxley. It was assigned reading my sophomore year in high school and it's stayed with me to this day. It's a sort of pre-Orwellian look at the future in an engineered society but with British humor and insight.

2. What the heck are your kids names?
HRH is His Royal Highness. That pseudonym was easy because he was the first grandchild born on Andy's side of the family who actually lived in this state. He is the second coming in the eyes of my MIL and SIL. Not such a bad thing. Except when he starts to believe his own press - or worse, when I do. RC is for Roger Clemens. Because he throws. EVERYTHING. I would have used Monkey but it was already taken. I think about changing RC's pseudonym but then find myself using it in emails to people I know IRL.

3. What made you want to blog?
Desperation. I stopped working (for money) in October of 2006. By March I was going insane. I joined the gym for sanity and yoga. One day, HRH had a complete meltdown in the parking lot of the gym and I found myself yelling back like a four-year-old; "It's not fair!" and I realized I needed to find a few like-minded people to rant to and have rant back. I think it's worked out pretty well.

4. How did you meet your husband?
Andy's version is that we met at Hooters. Anyone who has seen me and my girls knows this is not true. We were a set up. I was headed into town with my girlfriends and a friend at work told me to come to this bar where her friend's band was playing. Her husband is Andy's cousin, who had also been told to 'come hear the band'. The best part is that RJ Fitz, the bar in Boston where we met, was actually bought out by Hooters.

merlotmom asks...
5. If your husband gave you permission to sleep with one person, just once, of course, who would it be?
Not a second of hesitation or forethought needed because he knows and I have a list. Number one is Kevin Bacon. I loved him in Footloose and every movie since. He works for me. Big. Time. Like Bossy and John Cusak without The Thompson Twins playing in the background.

I loved this question and often ask it of others. Andy's number one is Salma Hayek.

slouching mom said...
6. How does your husband feel about your blogging?

He views it as a necessary evil. Kind of like antibiotics. He recognizes the value of my being able to relate to others even if he can't totally understand it. He likes my stories and likes the way I write, so that's a bonus. He definitely keeps the safety of our family at the forefront of his mind.

***as I was finishing up this post, Andy opened the door and said "you're not going to answer the names question, are you?" ***

Jen said...
7. Who's your favorite neighbor?

Yes, those Cheeky Little Monkeys are my neighbors. And they are the best you could ask for. We're thinking of taking them with us when we move. But don't worry, New Girl. She doesn't know my real name either.

8. What do you miss most about "life before kids"?

SLEEP. Actually, I miss just hanging out with my husband. We used to call each other at the end of the work day and decide if we were headed home or headed straight to our bar (where everyone knows your name) and meet up with all our other DINK friends.

And speak of the devil, the new girl asks...
9. What really scares you?

I guess you need to define 'really.' I'm terrified of centipedes, I don't like torture porn, and I'm medium-claustrophobic but what *really* scares me, is anything happening to my kids. Especially if it were in my presence and outside of my control. We couldn't even keep watching Syriana after Matt Damon's son dies. Thank you for getting all morbid on me. :-)~

JCK wanted to know...
10. Do you blog at the same time every day or at different times?

It's funny you ask this because I have noticed that most of us do it after 8:00 pm ET. I'm thinking bed time? Anyone?

I kind of have a pattern; I wake up, quickly check emails and blogs while getting the kids ready for the day, check/read/possibly write while RC is down for his nap, provided HRH is otherwise happy and engaged. Lastly, I check in post-kids' bedtime. Andy and I wrangle for computer time as we only have one currently working.

Mimi cracked me up with...
11. I don't know you at all: sum it up on one sentence?

Insecure, 39-year-old SAHM still waiting to feel like a grownup, with two brilliant, infuriating preschoolers, married to a man I like and love and deciding whether or not to 'go for the girl' before the timer runs out.

There you have it; in one big fat, run-on sentence.

ImpostorMom said...
12. What is the thing you like to do most with "you" time?

I really enjoy yoga. It relaxes and rejuvenates me. I would also like to look into meditation learn more about wine.

sue asked...
13. If you could go back to one moment in time and change it, what would the moment be and how would you change it?

October, 1989. I would un-meet Scott.

JCK said...
O.K., I have another one. How did you get so damn funny? Your comment about Sawyer on my blog made me almost pee my pants. I agree!!

I'm not going to answer this. I just wanted to make it perfectly clear that at least one other person in the blogisphere gets my sense of humor. Thank you JCK, clearly you rock.

Ask Wifey said...
14. I love your "Mommy's Time Out" wine bottle. Which do you prefer - white or red?

Oh, I'm an equal opportunity Whino. I've been on reds for a few years now. I love Pinot Noir, Merlot, Cabernet, and Andy and I brought home 11 bottles of Chianti from our honeymoon in Italy. That being said, I love freezing cold Santa Margarita Pinot Grigio in the summer and found an absolutely wonderful Chablis through a local wine store.

KC's question was...
15. If you had an extra hour in your day, how would you spend it?

SLEEPING. God, I fear this is true. Either that or I'd probably use it for another thankless, endless endeavor like folding clothes or cleaning. If it were a guilt-free enriching hour, see question 12. The idea of attending a wine course holds a lot of appeal as does working on 'me.'


Thank you again for not making me feel like a fool with no questions. The only thing I'd add is how fun and funny it is to relate your stories to other people and phrase it as, "my friend" did or said this...I've achieved what I wanted to in blogging; realizing that while I'm unique, there are a lot of us out there.

Enough About You, Let's Talk About Me

Right now, I feel like Drew Barrymore at the end of Never Been Kissed, alone on the pitcher's mound, waiting for Michael Vartan to come and rescue her from eternal embarassment.

Let me back up a step. We all try to remain somewhat incognito while sharing our most self absorbed innermost thoughts. But it's just what I've wanted you to know, you know? The New Girl, stole homaged a post from Mimi, who copied it from Beck. The idea was "Are there any questions?". So I'm putting myself out there, like Drew, hoping you're interested enough to ask me anything about me.

I'm putting myself out there for you, New Girl. Don't leave me hangin'.

Cabin Fever/Thoughts on Nick Jr.

Where the hell are Max and Ruby's parents and why are they living in my grandparents' house in the 1940s?







I find it scary concerning amusing that I set my kids up in front of the TV to watch a show about going outside and using your imagination.

I love Austin. He is my favorite Backyardigan. He is also by far the smartest. When I was google imaging for a picture, I found out I am not alone, which is a little disturbing.

It is widely recognized that Austin and Tasha (yellow hippo to Austin's right) are the Professor and MaryAnn of their generation.




New drinking game: Everytime Ming-Ming says "This is seeweeus [serious]," take a shot.

(Also, my neighbors dressed up as The Wonder Pets for Halloween.)

Originally, I preferred Steve to Joe on Blues Clues.









But now I've come to like Joe more.

It's kind of a BJ vs. Trapper thing.

(Current picture of Steve - weird. )

My Top 10 - The Unexpected Meme

While there is almost nothing I would change about my life right now, I recently read a question that's had me remembering fondly. The question was "What did you love most about being single?" Here's what I came up with in no particular order.

1. Living alone for five years. You really get to be best friends with your roommate. Actually, the next three are variations of a theme.
2. My apartment. Four sunny, big rooms in a great college area, in a house owned by an elderly couple much more interested in a good tenant than a good rent. Hey! That's me! I paid $450.00 a month -- including heat (for anyone reading this outside of the Northeast, this. is. unheard-of.) .
3. Having a bathroom all to myself - and never shutting the door.
4. Wherever I left something, that's where it was when I went looking for it.
5. Buying a brand new car without consulting anyone because I knew more about the subject than any of the men in my life at the time.
6. Having the time to read a lot and take classes because the topics interested me.
7. Spending far too much money on clothes or shoes, all for me.
8. Sleeping 12 hours a night (or sometimes four, if I was having fun).
9. Traveling so much for work that I saw some great places but none I liked enough to leave where I grew up.
10. Meeting Andy and falling in love.

So what did/do you love most about being single? Helena promised to blog more in '08, so we'll tag her, as well as the estimable, Mrs. Chicky.

Can't We Just Play AquaDots Instead?

She couldn’t believe that she’d actually agreed to have a drink with him – and at his house no less!
I really can't stay - Baby it's cold outside
I've got to go away - Baby it's cold outside

She’d given in to the holiday spirit and now, here she was in this terrible weather, looking for a way to escape.
This evening has been - Been hoping that you'd drop in
So very nice - I'll hold your hands, they're just like ice

She thought to herself, “I’ll use the old parents excuse.”
My mother will start to worry - Beautiful, what's your hurry
My father will be pacing the floor - Listen to the fireplace roar
So really I'd better scurry - Beautiful, please don't hurry

He was already so far gone that she figured one more drink would send him over the edge and she could run.
Well Maybe just a half a drink more - Put some music on while I pour

She was beginning to wonder if anyone would hear her screams, should it come to that.
The neighbors might think - Baby, it's bad out there

She was beginning to feel the effects of something more than two glasses of “eggnog”
Say, what's in this drink - No cabs to be had out there

She could feel the waves crash over her, pulling her under
I wish I knew how - Your eyes are like starlight now
To break this spell - I'll take your hat, your hair looks swell
I ought to say no, no, no, sir - Mind if I move a little closer
At least I'm gonna say that I tried - What's the sense in hurting my pride
I really can't stay - Baby don't hold out
Ahh, but it's cold outside

C'mon baby

Before the euphoria fully envelops her, she puts it as plainly as possible:
I simply must go - Baby, it's cold outside
The answer is no - Ooh baby, it's cold outside

But tries not to awaken the beast that lurks inside
This welcome has been - I'm lucky that you dropped in
So nice and warm -- Look out the window at that storm

She thinks; let him think that someone will be looking for her
My sister will be suspicious - Man, your lips look so delicious

No, someone who could take him
My brother will be there at the door - Waves upon a tropical shore

She casts about for something that will help her.
My maiden aunt's mind is vicious - Gosh your lips look delicious

She reaches into her pocket and presses the panic button of the cell phone
Well maybe just a half a drink more - Never such a blizzard before
I've got to go home - Oh, baby, you'll freeze out there

She searches for some kind of weapon
Say, lend me your comb - It's up to your knees out there

She hears the sirens in the distance
You've really been grand - Your eyes are like starlight now

Keep him talking…
But don't you see - How can you do this thing to me
There's bound to be talk tomorrow - Making my life long sorrow
At least there will be plenty implied - If you caught pneumonia and died

Yes, the sirens are definitely headed this way.
I really can't stay - Get over that old out
Ahh, but it's cold outside
Baby it's cold outside
Brr its cold...It's cold out there
Can’t you stay awhile longer baby

She just needs to hold on for a few more seconds
Well... I really shouldn't... alright
Make it worth your while baby
Ahh, do that again...

Police! Hands in the air!