Like The New Girl Always Says: "Ask the Internets"

I hate potty training. It's like Groundhog Day for mommies; discuss, cajole, bribe, clean, repeat. Dozens and dozens of times.

I had fooled myself early on. The boys often take baths together and of course, HRH always uses the potty prior to entering the tub. RC was always fascinated with the process and HRH was only too happy to show off his skills in the art of urination. I said to myself and Andy, "potty training with this one's is gonna be a piece of cake". Um yeah. Pride cometh before a fall - or in this case, summer. For a while, RC has clearly displayed all the signs of readiness and I've half-heartedly tried to introduce him to using the toilet. He is not interested. Let me repeat; he wants no part of it.

Last week, RC stepped it up a notch. In addition to removing his own diaper if it was wet, he's begun to take it off immediately after he poops as well, sometimes allowing the contents to drop onto the floor. Upon the first such incident last week, I was dealing with the diaper and the floor while he started running around trying to back into everything - and practically sitting on our poor dog, saying menacingly "I'm gonna get poops on you!"

So now we've got the sticker chart, I've purchased the Halloween sized bags of M&Ms as a bribe for sitting on the potty, I've told him kids with diapers can't go to preschool, and I've promised the kid a BIKE once he's done with diapers.

He's just plain not interested. If it weren't for the shitting in the house thing, I'd probably just blow it off for another month or two. But clearly this activity has upped the ante and it needs to be addressed. The problem is that like so many areas of RC's personality, I'm out of ideas. I don't want to make it a negative but clearly he can not relieve himself where ever he damn well pleases.

Help me Obi Wan; you're my only hope.

Signed -

Pouting About the Potty

Om

This is the picture hanging over my kitchen table. I had it framed in a dark wood frame that exactly matches my table and chairs. The yellow just below the upper set of houses is the exact shade of my walls.

It makes me happy to sit, and drink tea, and look at this scene. In the same way I can watch Under the Tuscan Sun and Much Ado About Nothing over and over again.

Visual bliss.

Summer Cold

You wake
With a cough
Too hot
Cozy on the couch
Blanket and pillow
DVD
More juice
We move through the day
Time for bed
Snuggling
Tired boy
You fall right to sleep
You wake coughing and crying, again
I move you to our bed and lie with you
Mommy's here
I kiss your forehead to check your temperature
Still hot
I kiss you again
Just because
You cough
You cry
So tired
I comfort
I love you

25 Things I Like About Myself

My friend, Jenn at Juggling Life took up the challenge to write 50 things she liked about herself - and did it in 14 minutes. Sue at My Party of 6 let me know it was okay to only list 25. And to take a little longer. That's more my style. So here we go;

1. I'm a good writer

2. I'm pretty

3. I've been taking better care of my body and it's starting to pay off

4. I'm getting better at yoga

5. I have set aside my natural tendencies to be a night owl and choose to be pleasant in the morning

6. I cook reasonably well-balanced meals most nights

7. I'm pretty good at compromise despite being a Virgo

8. I picked out good names for my children

9. I'm a good speller

10. I use grammar correctly in speaking and writing

11. I've taught my children excellent manners

12. I'm a good daughter, mother, wife, sibling, and friend

14. I'm very good at Excel

15. I make my bed every day

16. I tan easily

17. I have big brown eyes

18. I'm a good organizer

19. I enjoy learning

20. I have good taste when decorating

21. I'm a fun drunk

22. Parenting has taught me to be more patient

23. I picked the best person to marry

24. I'm learning to be more flexible

25. I wrote this whole list without putting in a single asterisk

I created this list in one sitting with one minor interruption to mediate a video game dispute. Hey, I never said I was perfect!

Going to Hell in a Laundry Basket

Lest you think I have only been ignorning all of you as we transition from school schedule to summer schedule, I give you exhibit A: This is our playroom loveseat, rendered completely unusable for its given purpose. Need a clean t-shirt, hon? Oh, I did a bleach wash. Go check the basement...

Wordless Wednesday

My mistake; you weren't tired.

Happy Mother's Day!!

No, it's not a typo. My Mother's Day present arrived today. I'll give you one guess as to what it is: Right now, even as we speak, I am blogging from my front porch!!

After much cluelessness on my part, random fishing expeditions into our desktop, technical discussions with any neighbor unlucky enough to be outside at the same time as me (waves to Chuck and John!), a chat session with a very nice Indian tech at Linksys, and eventually, a quick trip to Best Buy for a new wireless router, my stunningly beautiful new Dell Latitude and I are doin' it wirelessly!

Um, it's a little chilly out here. But Andy dragged the boat out front and is working on the final touches so that we can, at long last, hit the shallow river we can walk across, if necessary open waters in That Kintner Boy just in time for Father's Day. So I want to be with him. Outside. In the cold. Blogging.

For those of you who really want to know, for Father's Day, Andy is getting a new bilge pump! See? The romance around here? It just. never. ends.

Happy Father's Day to all you Daddies, first timers and old timers. May your children sleep in and may you wake to the smell of fresh coffee and frying bacon.

Ambush Makeover

Ta-freakin'-da!

So what do you guys think? The grey-on-grey was really starting to get to me and the alternatives on Blogger were either equally grim or already taken by my blog buddies. When Holly re-animated her life with stunningly, retro, mid-century results, I decided it was time to take the plunge. Especially when I saw my new best friend's awesome rates.

I've been working with Cyn, the Nap Warden over at NW Designs to create my awesome new look. Okay, done with the hyperlinks. She could not have been easier to work with.

• When I said I liked apple green but not mint green, she knew what I meant.


• When I said I wanted something "different" but didn't know what, she gave me options.


• When I said I wanted to be 110 lbs driving around in a Benz convertible...well, there's only so much magic she can work.

So the boys and I are off to a beach/playdate so this is yet another drive by blog but please, kick off your shoes, wander around, make yourselves at home. There's iced tea in the fridge. I'll be back shortly.

Really Random Stuff

RC: Wow. Wow! WOW!

MM: What is it, buddy?

RC: Nothing, Mommy. I'm just wowing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Tired of Green Eggs and Ham? Try today's special:

Although it's one of the lesser known Seusses, this was the book that my 34-year-old brother LOVED when he was a kid. So much so that every member of my household had it memorized. I remember it fondly when I was an 8-year-old-girl reading it to my 3-year-old brother and I love it now that I'm a 39-year-old mom reading to my 3- and 5-year-old sons.

~~~~~~~(no good way to segue here)

I had a dream last night that I was late coming home because I was having a rendezvous with Sawyer from Lost. I did. not. want to wake up.

Why I Spell Kenmore with an F

Before:

After:

I can't even blame the boys for this one. Just really cheap parts.

Why I'm Going to Hell

The New Girl has been polling the blogosphere lately asking what we'd like to hear about. One recent post was Memories (no cheesy spelling here) in which she talks about those memories that are much more visceral than others; where you can really feel the emotions just as the events unfolded on the day they occurred. In one, TNG talks about not paying for the hot chocolate of a mentally challenged man who didn't have enough money to pay at a gourmet shop. It started me thinking about some of those not-so-proud moments from my past. Here's one.

We're in our late teens/early twenties returning from a midnight show in my friend, Joe's car. There were six of us slammed into his '79 Dodge Aspen, with three of my good-sized guy friends in the backseat. We're stopped at a red light when Buffalo Stance comes on the radio (yes, it's playing in the background right now) so we turn. it. up. and commence with the over-the-top singing and dancing. The guys in back start noticing how the car bounces when they slam into each other and gyrations continue.

As the light changes from red to green, we notice the car next to us, with a couple inside giving us the finger as they take off. WTF? Being a bunch of pseudo-adolescents, we goad Joe into following them to find out what the deal is. Please keep in mind that we're hardly a bunch of thugs. I mean, we all met at Catholic school for God's sake! We're just being absurd and want to find out why they gave us the finger.

We move from a pretty main road in our town to a more residential neighborhood. They definitely know we're following them. They make the fatal mistake of turning onto a dead end street and with that, the guy slams their car into park and jumps out of the car, intent on protecting his girlfriend.

Our boys get out of the car as well only to learn that…the couple is deaf. When we were dancing in the car, they thought we were making fun of them using sign language and flipped us off! They were scared to death.

For what it was worth, everyone (and by everyone, I mean the guys because thank GOD, my girlfriend and I had never gotten out of the car, so I was able to just slide under the dashboard and watch everything unfold) apologized and explained what we thought had occurred, and that of course they weren't planning to beat this couple up (Really! I mean it! We weren't those type of kids! Please don't judge me!). In the end, the guys shook hands and all was 'well.'

I'm pretty sure I went to church the next day. Doesn't matter, my elevator is still going down.

Thanks, TNG for helping me to dredge up that painful memory. Now I'm going to have to go to church again.